When I was a teenager, I wrote in a notebook, Desirelessness is liberation, which I undoubtedly copied from some "deep" novel. I read books like The Way of a Pilgrim, & tried to chant the Jesus prayer: "Jesus Christ have mercy on me, a miserable sinner." I couldn't help but edit it: I was Jewish & didn't feel like a miserable sinner at all. I was a triumphant sinner! I quickly got it down to "have mercy on me," but then I wasn't asking anyone, & I didn't think there was anybody (AnyBody) to ask. And that was the end of my sainthood career. I liked (& like) living in the world so much more!